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Welcome to the Positivity
Blog Express
Join a community of like-minded
people to read and/or converse about the power
of Positivity. The Positivity Blog is now up and
running and I Invite you to participate. Click
here to share your thoughts on this month's
topic about forgiveness and sign up to receive
upcoming posts. Collectively, let's share the
power of Positivity. Forgive
To pardon, to waive any negative feeling or
desire for punishment; (intransitive) to accord
forgiveness.
The Power of Forgiveness
The root of forgive is the Latin word personage,
meaning "to give completely, without
reservation."
As I sat in silence, the way I always do when
contemplating what to focus on for the
Positivity newsletters, the issue of forgiveness
came to mind. I've recently seen a number of
people, people I don't actually know, out in
public treating each other with such disregard.
Indeed, I believe that we are happier when we
are not burdened with being angry at others for
what we perceive they have done to us and
likewise, frustration with ourselves for not
living up to our own and others' expectations of
ourselves. We act out. We're human and that's
what we do. Being forgiving of ourselves, as
well as others, is one of the most loving gifts
we can give and the reward is significant.
Forgiving someone does not mean that you ignore
that another person has treated you in a hurtful
manner. It doesn't minimize the wrong doing or
justify the action. You can forgive the person
without accepting the act. Forgiveness brings a
lighter energy; it brings peace to your heart
and helps you move forward in your life.
Some things can seem harder to forgive than
others - the bank for refusing to work with you
so you don't lose your house to foreclosure or
an interview process that ended with a promise
of a job that didn't materialize. I'm in awe
when I see one of those shows on TV when someone
has lost a loved one at the hands of another, by
way of drunk driving, for example, and somehow
manage to forgive the guilty party. The reasons
for forgiveness vary. They may range from
knowing that the loved one who has crossed over
would not want remaining friends and family to
live with hate in their hearts, to referring to
the love of God, who advocates forgiveness, to
finding a way to help others as a result of the
tragedy. No one answer applies to all people.
These issues cause hardships and the pain is
real. But, if we harbor resentments, it
paralyzes us and succeeds in stopping our focus
of working to bring what we truly want into our
lives. What can we learn from these experiences
that can help us become the best we can be? When
we are the best we can be, the universe aligns
in a positive way to bring us what we most
desire in life. It may not happen immediately,
but I truly believe that with a forward-thinking
attitude and a heart full of love, not
resentment, we are more apt to have good come
into our lives. So, endeavor, once you are able,
to forgive. Life is too short and time too
precious to use your energy for anything that
does not bring you joy and help you embrace your
life journey.
Forgiving Ourselves
One of the most difficult things we can do is to
forgive ourselves.
We're hard on ourselves; we set a high bar of
expectations. I've had my fair share of working
to forgive myself. Most recently, this has had
to do with a volunteer activity. For a long
time, I wanted to be a hospice volunteer. I
managed to commit the time and attend all of the
training sessions, eventually being assigned
clients. I loved it. Spending time sitting with,
listening to and singing for, these amazing
people was such a gift. But, the demands of my
day job made it challenging to commit to a
designated time each week. Work deadlines and
business travel was making this rewarding
experience stressful. So, for the time being, I
have had to step away from this volunteer
opportunity. I had to forgive myself for failing
to meet my own expectations and perhaps those of
the wonderful people who invited me to be a part
of the hospice family. I believe that sometime
in the future I will be in a position to once
again have hospice care as a part of my life and
I very much look forward to that time.
By a certain age, we have a long "to do" list,
with items that need to be accomplished in order
to be successful or to live up to others'
expectations of us (the latter we should avoid,
by the way). What if we let that "to do" list go
and forgave ourselves for not having checked
everything off of it? The list keeps changing
anyway. As we move through our lives, what we
want changes, so let's move with the flow of
those changes. Trust our instincts, open our
hearts and enjoy life as best we can. Forgiving
ourselves opens us up for change and gives us
permission to let go of fear. That's a pretty
good place to be.
The Benefits of Forgiveness
Forgiveness carries with it a number of
benefits, which include:
- A positive disposition
- Compassionate relationships
- Decreased stress, so improved health
- An opportunity to be a role model for others
- Peace of mind
When I wrote my book, The 10 Be's Of Positivity,
10 Steps To a more Positive Way of Living, one
of the endorsers of the book was a wonderful man
named Dr. Robert Muller. He was the co-founder
of The University of Peace and served as
Assistant Secretary General of the United
Nations. He was also the author of Most of All
They Taught Me Happiness. In fact, it was by his
suggestion that one of the chapters in my book
is on the power of forgiveness. When he read the
manuscript, he said he thought the chapters were
right on point in terms of focusing on
Positivity, but the one area he thought would be
a welcome inclusion was that of forgiveness. I
agreed and included this area in the book. Dr.
Muller wrote the following piece, which I share
with you below.
Decide to Forgive
For resentment is negative
Resentment is poisonous
Resentment diminishes and devours the self
Be the first to forgive
To smile and take the first step
And you will see happiness bloom
on the face of your human brother and sister
Be always the first
Do not wait for others to forgive
For by forgiving you become the master of fate
The fashioner of life
A doer of miracles
To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form
of love
In return you will receive
Untold peace and happiness
Affirmation
Forgiveness is the Path I Choose to Walk
Forgiveness Quotes
When you hold resentment
toward another, you are bound to that person or
condition by an emotional link that is stronger
than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to
dissolve that link and get free.
~Catherine Ponder
There is no love without forgiveness and
there is no forgiveness without love.
~Bryant H. McGill
Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys
them so much.
~Oscar Wilde quotes (Irish Poet, Novelist,
Dramatist and Critic, 1854-1900)
To forgive is to set a prisoner free and
discover that the prisoner was you.
~Lewis B. Smedes
Sincere forgiveness isn't colored with
expectations that the other person will
apologize or change. Don't worry whether or not
they finally understand you. Love them and
release them. Life feeds back truth to people in
its own way and time.
~Sara Paddison
Seize the Day!
Celebrate September
The Month of September is... Classical
Music Month
September 5th
Labor Day
Cheese Pizza Day
September 6th
Read a Book Day
September 11th
Grandparents Day
September 13th
Fortune Cookie Day
Positive Thinking Day
September 21st
International Peace Day |
Celebrate October
The Month of October is... Breast
Cancer,
Cookie, International Drum, National
Pizza, and National Popcorn Popping
Month
October 5th
Do Something Nice Day
October 7th
World Smile Day
October 30th
National Candy Corn Day
October 31st
Halloween
Increase Your Psychic Powers Day
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A special thank you to Pat Durner for her
help with this newsletter. You are appreciated!
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